*Twas the month before Christmas*
*When all through our land,*
*Not a Christian was praying*
*Nor taking a stand.*
*See the PC Police had taken away,*
*The reason for Christmas - no one could say.*
*The children were told by their schools not to sing,*
*About Shepherds and Wise Men and Angels and things.*
*It might hurt people’s feelings, the teachers would say*
* December 25th is just a ‘ Holiday ‘.*
*Yet the shoppers were ready with cash, checks and credit*
*Pushing folks down to the floor just to get it!*
*CDs from Madonna, an X BOX, an I-pod*
*Something was changing, something quite odd! *
*Retailers promoted Ramadan and Kwanzaa*
*In hopes to sell books by Franken & Fonda.*
*As Targets were hanging their trees upside down*
* At Lowe’s the word Christmas - was nowhere to be found.*
*At K-Mart and Staples and Penny’s and Sears*
*You won’t hear the word Christmas; it won’t touch your ears.*
*Inclusive, sensitive, Di-ver-si-ty*
*Are words that were used to intimidate me..*
*Now Daschle, Now Darden, Now Sharpton, Wolf Blitzen*
*On Boxer, on Rather, on Kerry, on Clinton !*
*At the top of the Senate, there arose such a clatter*
*To eliminate Jesus, in all public matter.*
*And we spoke not a word, as they took away our faith*
* Forbidden to speak of salvation and grace*
*The true Gift of Christmas was exchanged and discarded*
*The reason for the season, stopped before it started.*
*So as you celebrate ‘Winter Break’ under your ‘Dream Tree’*
*Sipping your Starbucks, listen to me.*
*Choose your words carefully, choose what you say*
*Shout MERRY CHRISTMAS , not Happy Holiday !*

MERRY CHRISTMAS

Now, I know that many people out there don’t believe in taking medication for something like this but not everyone agrees with Tom Cruise or his loony band of alien worshipers. Talk about people who need to be on medication…sheesh! I’m all for trying to keep my body pure but not at the cost of my happiness. Since I went on my daily dose of HAPPY I have noticed a change in myself and my attitude towards people and life in general. Even some friends and family have noticed a difference… that I seem more like my old self pre-cancer. (If you wanna read about all THAT then just check out my about me page. Trust me though, it’s depressing shat.) Let me add here that only a very select few even knew that I had gone on anti-depressants so they noticed a change in me all by their lonesome selves.

Of course I still have bad days, or “down time” as I lovingly refer to it. Some people refer to these moments as “have you taken your pill yet today?” days. Such sweet and loving farkers. =] The whole reason behind this rambling post is that recently i’ve been thinking about stopping the anti-depressants and going it all my myself, but after accidentally missing my pill for two days in a row I have changed my mind. O_O I can easily feel the difference in myself. For example, I have started back taking them and today was my second day back on and I feel….. strange. Right now I would love nothing more than to go lay down and fall asleep wearing a perma-frown on my face. I hate feeling this way and i’m sure you will agree with me on that.

So, in conclusion to this long rant - but still NOWHERE close to the famous Chris Crocker, yeah you know who that is, Leave Britney Alone rant - I Heart my anti-depressants. How can I not when they help ME be ME with a REAL smile on my face instead of faking it. Nobody likes a faker. ;]

1. When you are sad — I will jump on the person who made you sad like a spider monkey jacked up on mountain dew.

2. When you are blue — I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.

3. When you smile — I will know you are plotting something that I must be involved in.

4. When you are scared — I will rag on you about it every chance I get.

5. When you are worried — I will tell you horrible stories about how much Worse it could be until you quit whining.

6. When you are confused — I will use little words.

7. When you are sick — Stay away from me until you are well again. I don’t want whatever you have.

8. When you fall — I will point and laugh at your clumsy butt.

9. This is my oath…. I pledge it to the end. ‘Why?’ you may ask; ‘because you are my friend’.

These just crack me up. :p

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are flat?

Why do banks charge a fee on “insufficient funds” when they know there is not enough?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

Whose idea was it to put an “S” in the word “lisp”?

What is the speed of darkness?

Why is it that people say they “slept like a baby” when babies wake up every two hours?

If the temperature is zero outside today and it’s going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?

Do married people live longer than single ones or does it only seem longer?

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

Did you ever stop and wonder……

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, “I think I’ll squeeze these pink dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?”

Who was the first person to say, “See that chicken there… I’m gonna eat the next thing that comes outta its bum.”

Why do toasters always have a setting so high that could burn the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don’t point to their bum when they ask where the bathroom is?

Why does your Obstetrician, Gynecologist leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They’re both dogs!

If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

Stop singing and read on……. Yes, it caught me too!

Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog’s face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?

Found this on SpongeFish